Halloween dos and don’ts

Tips for taking ranch kids trick-or-treating.

We’ve never lived in a suburban neighborhood, but I’ve always taken our kids trick-or-treating — even if it meant driving a ways to get off the ranch and into civilization. I don’t want my kids to miss out on one of the hallmarks of American childhood: collecting candy from random adults wearing costumes meant to frighten them. Then we go home, and I remind them not to talk to strangers or take food from people they don’t know.

In years past, I’ve dressed up the baby and taken pumpkin-shaped cookies to elk hunters camped up the canyon for “reverse trick-or-treating.” We’ve stashed candy at the cookhouse and taken the kids door-to-door around ranch headquarters. I’ve driven costumed kids around neighborhoods where we knew no one because we’d only lived there three weeks and looked for streets that appeared “Halloween-ish,” then parked and hopped out to join the fray.

Eleven years into my parenting journey, here are a few of my Halloween dos and don’ts.

Do coordinate a family costume

Because if you succeed, you are my hero. I have tried to get my kids to do themed costumes with me, but it always falls apart because no one wants to relinquish their desired costume for the sake of the group. It’s rugged individualism applied to a children’s holiday. What can I say except “’Merica.”

Don’t buy a costume

This is my new rule for my 9-year-old son. For the past two years, I bought him a new costume, and he ended up dressing like a cowboy using clothes he already owned and wore every day. This year, he’s embracing the inevitable and planning to wear his shiny rodeo chaps and dress up like Zac Dallas, his buddy/hero who is currently ranked 13th in the Professional Rodeo Cowboys Association World Standings for saddle bronc riding and just qualified for his first Wrangler National Finals Rodeo. They both wear glasses and are about the same height, so the impersonation will be spot-on.

Do pack an overnight bag

Most families don’t bring a change of clothes and a toothbrush, but I learned it’s a good idea to throw in a few supplies when driving 70 miles to trick-or-treat. We made the long trek to town one year only to discover the front end of my pickup vibrated with more intensity than is desirable when I got on the interstate to drive home. I was pretty sure it was due to an extreme buildup of mud from the 20 miles of oil road we’d driven to get there, but not sure enough to go 75 mph over two mountain summits with three small children in the pitch-black of a late October night.

So, we got a hotel room in town, and I showed up at the mechanic’s the next morning with Laura Ingalls Wilder, a dragon, complete with face mask and tail, and a miniature fireman. The receptionist seemed unfazed by my kids’ attire, which told me a little something about her regular clientele. Luckily, it was just mud buildup, so a thorough pressure washing had us back on the road with plenty of sugary snacks for the long drive.

Do regulate candy consumption

Another lesson learned the hard way. One year I wanted to be the fun mom, so I turned my 3-year-old and 1-year-old loose with their candy buckets in the bedrooms. Sure enough, I woke up to the youngest one puking all over his bed. Nowadays, buckets are handed over to Mom and Dad for raiding — I mean, safekeeping.

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