Cowkids at the Coast

The ocean was (almost) as exciting as pizza delivery.

My three kids have lived on some of the most remote cattle ranches in the American West and laid tracks all over deserts of both northern and southern varieties. But until last month, they’d never seen an ocean. I’ve been informed that the sagebrush sea doesn’t count.

I couldn’t wait to show them the real ocean, the one with saltwater and wet sand. Five minutes after our arrival at the Pacific, my daughter announced her assessment.

“I don’t like it,” she said. “It smells funny.”

She eventually got used to the odor and jumped in the waves. Riding a boogie board was fun, and the excitement didn’t stop when we left the surf. Here are a few other unexpected highlights from our coastal getaway.

Riding in a Car

“We’ve never ridden in a car before,” my son said as he stepped into my friend’s sedan.

He marveled at how small and low to the ground the backseat was. I marveled at the high gas mileage and low cost of tires.

My kids’ usual ride is my F-150, and sometimes we jump into their dad’s dually. All my babies were brought home from the hospital in an old flatbed pickup. That wasn’t for sentiment’s sake; it was our only vehicle for the first several years of our marriage. The closest I’ve come to owning a car was my 1995 Jeep Cherokee, which could have probably climbed over cars, so it doesn’t count. The tires were cheap, though.

Pizza Delivery

I’ve made pizza dough from scratch and grated my own mozzarella for the topping, but it paled in comparison to the thrill of receiving a ready-made pepperoni pie delivered right to our doorstep with a ring of the doorbell. Judging by the way they ran to open the door and grabbed the warm, greasy boxes, you would’ve thought it was the first time they’d ever seen melted cheese.

It was almost as exciting as when they experienced the doorbell from the outside of the house.

Ringing the Doorbell

This device fulfills the main entertainment requirements for kids: It’s a button that makes noise when you push it and annoys your mom. I can count on one hand the number of times my kids have rang a doorbell in their whole (albeit short so far) lives, and four of those times occurred immediately after we arrived at my aunt’s house.

Walking on a Sidewalk

My daughter was excited when I told her we’d park near the beach and walk the rest of the way to the ocean.

“You mean we get to walk on a sidewalk?” she shouted. “I love sidewalks!”

And here I thought visiting the Pacific Ocean for the first time would be the main draw. My daughter has lived on remote ranches that many people only dream of visiting and has ridden horses that buck, but the girl has never lived in town. Walking on smooth, paved surfaces is an unusual experience for her and her brothers. I guess excitement is in the novelty.

For this mom, anxiety was in the novelty. Taking three feral ranch kids to town and navigating sidewalks — and the accompanying traffic that zooms by mere inches away — was scarier than watching them put the first ride on a green colt. I’m pretty sure they can get bucked off a gentle 2-year-old and walk away to tell the tale. I can’t say the same for an encounter with a motorized vehicle, even if it is a small sedan.

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